Cinfulcinnamon's Blog

Bucket List Item ~~~~~~BFF

Posted on: January 12, 2010

   I was going to write about something else today, but this particular blog needs to get out there while I am “feeling” it. A little background first if you please…..

     When I was a kid, we moved ALOT. I can remember that the longest time that we lived anywhere was 4 years. My Mom and Dad were constantly buying property and fixing it up and then we would move on to the next one. In admiration of them, I would also say that they always made money doing it. But from one somewhat run down farm to the next, we would pack up and move. So, over those years, my “friends” were my animals. I loved and still do love horses. I had several. We were a working dairy farm for a time as well. So, I’ve lived with and worked around horses, cows, pigs, chickens, ducks…you name it. But I didn’t get to spend a lot of time with kids my own age. I was pretty much a loner to begin with and this didn’t bother me much. I had my horse, and school was really just a necessary evil anyhow…so I would go there, and then come home and ride.

     Then I went into the Air Force. Travelled a lot then too. Not a biggie for me. Long as I had my “stuff” around me I could make a nest anywhere. So, now you know a little about the background to know that I adapted well (or at least I think so) and can pick up and go wherever I need to for whatever the reason may be.

     I recently (3 months ago) got married.  I moved from Ohio to Florida. After my divorce in ’97 I had moved back to Ohio to be near my folks. Since they have both passed away, there wasn’t anything holding me in Ohio, so when I met my husband, there wasn’t any reason for me not to follow him here. Especially since we have a huge beautiful home and the weather is nicer. It wasn’t so easy on my son. He’s 17 and a junior in high school. He’s at that age that requires him to have his “buds” around him. I will save that stress for another blog but I wanted to mention here that there is a little tension because of the move. Maybe that is why this is so important to talk about today.

     A few years ago, I made a list of a couple of things that I want to do/accomplish/have before I die. When the movie Bucket List came out, I really liked it because it reminded me of my own list. When I reach the rocking chair…and I hope that I do….and if I can still think clearly then…very questionable….there are 3 things that I would like to be able to smile about.

1)  I never want to say, “Oh I wish I’d done this or that, gone here or there, tried this or that”

2)  A good man who would love me with all my faults and flaws and that I can say we’d had a good ride together.

3) A best girlfriend. Someone that also accepts me with all my faults and flaws. Someone I could tell all my secrets to, talk trash about other women with, and share our experiences about kids, men, and all the other crap that women have together.

     The first item of course, I am working on. Seems to be going well, and if my health and bank account hold out, maybe there won’t be too many regrets.  The second, I am praying that I have found with my husband. After the failures that I have had in the past, he’d better be the one, because I’m too old for house breaking men.

     And the third item I have also found. I met a woman a couple of years ago. Actually met she and her husband in the lifestyle. We have been playmates many times. But we’ve also done the regular “vanilla” stuff together too. Family outings, getting tattooed together, shopping, talking clothes, drinking, laughing, and generally causing mischief when we get the chance.  She was one of two matrons of honor at my wedding.  I love her dearly. And then of course I do what I usually do. I move.

Last night we were texting and I realized how much I missed her. She lived an hour or so away from me in Ohio, and we’re just as close now (by phone) as we’ve always been, but it’s different. Things have been a little rough in some areas down here (another blog to come), and I have been a bit sarcastic and mean to her lately. Being the woman that she is….and why I’m convinced that we are twin sisters from different mothers…..she asked me point-blank why I was being such a bitch to her. That’s when I realized how lonely I was down here. Yes, I have the new husband, and my son and the people who I’ve met down here, but it isn’t the same. I’m on my own again and this time it’s not so fun being a loner. Our lives are busy, and to maintain a relationship of any kind takes work. Well, I just wanted to go on record here and say that I’m willing, because she’s worth it. She’s hard-headed, controlling, bitchy and picky. And she reminds me of me. She demands loyalty just like I do. Not many people really get that whole thing, but she does. If someone does me wrong they are her enemy too. Same as if someone does something against her, they have me to deal with too. In my humble opinion, we are and can be quite the force to be reckoned with. I like that. And so to you….Chelle…..thanks girlfriend. I love ya !!!


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Goofy Me

I am: an Air Force vet, Mom, sister, friend, Lifestyler, and all-around smartass with a heart of gold. I have lived all over the far East and learned many things about people and cooking, art and true value. I like to share my experience with the rest of the world. I will be the most loyal friend or most annoying enemy you've ever known. Honest to a fault. My life has not always been easy, but it has never ever been boring.

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