Cinfulcinnamon's Blog

Bullies and “Gang” Mentality

Posted on: January 16, 2010

     I will be the first one to admit, that as a kid I was a bully. Not to kids I didn’t know, I was much too shy for that. But I was the oldest of 4, and I was a terrible bully to my brother and 2 sisters. I basically ignored my brother, unless I wanted him to ride ponies with me but to my sisters that kept trying to hang around “big sis” I was terrible. I used to tie them to trees and make them eat cigarette butts. I think I did this because as young kids, I did see them lick ash trays. I’ve read somewhere that when kids do that they might have some kind of a mineral deficiency or something like that. But, whatever the case I did it. I can admit it now, because I have since apologized to both sisters and helped them quite a lot in their lives if I could.

     I learned a lot since the days of being a bully. I’ve done some things in my life that weren’t the most pleasant, and I’ve grown from those mistakes too. Our past makes us who we are. And I am not perfect. Not by a long damn shot. But I am honest, and loyal. And I will defend my family and friends to the end. I’ve been stuck in the middle of a few shit storms without an umbrella in my time, but I have to tell you about one today that was a REAL doozie.

     I’ve been embroiled in a conflict that had to do with something that I wrote here. My opinion on how something was handled…or should I say not handled.  And it has caused lines to be drawn. I am still shaking my head on the way that a “gang” mentality will take over if people see a chance to jump into the middle of a fray just to make themselves look good. And it doesn’t even have to have anything to do with them. Some people just like to be part of the gang.

When I was on the farm, I raised chickens. Now chickens are some of nastiest foul fowl on the planet. If they see another chicken with anything out of the ordinary, whether it was a feather that’s a different color, or a scratch where the bird might have hurt itself, the other chickens will not leave it alone….until it is run off from the rest, or dead. They will peck it and run it until the poor bird runs away if it can, or if it’s in a pen with them, it just gives up and lets them kill it. Just one of Natures nastier ways I suppose.

     Maybe that’s how the phrase “being a chicken” came about. They have to be in a group to mistreat another. At one point today, I was arguing against 6 people. Four of which had no business even sticking their noses into the argument. But the really truly amazing part of it all was this: Five of the six had issues with each other that spanned years of dissent. Each had talked about the other like they were a dog. In fact, some really really nasty stuff had been said about each of them to the others.  And yet….all these people found some common ground today. They all banded together to have their say against me in this argument. One person, outnumbered, out of state and standing there with nothing to defend myself with except my word and my honor. But it didn’t matter to these people. Next week, they will be back at each others throats over this party, or this group, or this ones looks, or this ones friends. But today, they were all rolling around orgasming (if that’s a word) because they had a common enemy. Me. It was breath-taking.

     Did it teach me anything? Nope. I’ve seen this kind of thing before. On the farm, and in life. I just had never been a party to any of it before, and I’d certainly never been the victim of it before. But when it was all said and done….I know two things. I’m still the good person that my son and my husband and my true friends love. And I know  that bunch will run separately again after today, with their eyes in the back of their heads checking to make sure that the posse doesn’t decide to make them the target another day like they did me.

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Goofy Me

I am: an Air Force vet, Mom, sister, friend, Lifestyler, and all-around smartass with a heart of gold. I have lived all over the far East and learned many things about people and cooking, art and true value. I like to share my experience with the rest of the world. I will be the most loyal friend or most annoying enemy you've ever known. Honest to a fault. My life has not always been easy, but it has never ever been boring.

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