Cinfulcinnamon's Blog

Lifestylers ~ Plastic Surgery = Plastic People?

Posted on: January 19, 2010

Today’s topic comes from conversations with a friend about folks that have plastic surgeries. Now, it just so happens that this friend doesn’t like some of the people that they have met in the lifestyle who have had some “work” done. I’m hoping to put my take on some of this. Again, for the record….my blog ~ my opinion.

Despite the popular misconception, the word “plastic” in “plastic surgery” does not mean “artificial,” but is derived from the ancient Greek work “plastikos,” which means to mold or give form. Plastic surgery includes both the reconstructive and aesthetic subspecialties.

That’s just to get the medical jargon out of the way. I had also wondered where the term came from until I started looking up things about plastic surgery. Now the more popular term is cosmetic surgery. I’d also like to state that I have had breast augmentation. I did this about 7 years ago. I had always been small in that area. And I am a tall woman with wide hips. After giving birth to my son and breast-feeding him, I was left with what I like to term “empty wallets”…LOL  But while breast-feeding, Dolly Parton had nothing on me. And I just loved the look and feel of fuller breasts. So as soon as I could save the money (and I only had to sell two houses as a real estate agent) to have enough. I will go on record as saying that it was the best money I’ve ever spent. I feel like the extra fullness helps to even out my proportions better. And I won’t lie about the fact that I have enjoyed the extra attention I’ve gotten too.

I have absolutely NO PROBLEM with anyone that wants to improve the way they feel about themselves with the use of cosmetic surgery. It has helped to boost my self-esteem and confidence in ways that I don’t think any amount of counselling could have done. But sometimes, and I too, have seen this happen also: When someone who may have thought that they were unattractive for whatever reason, chooses to have “work” done, they forget that there are psychological changes that also take place along with the physical changes in their bodies. I know with myself I felt very self conscience at first. I used to have nightmares after I had my boobjob. I dreamed that I would be kidnapped, and tortured and my implants would be cut out of me. It was very scary for a time. And of course the pain of healing and the fact that you must give the implants a chance to settle into place is also uncomfortable. Getting used to moving my arms again (around a larger chest area) was also an issue. But after a few months of getting used to my new measurements I was ready to buy sexier clothes. That was the fun part. Throwing away old bras and tank tops that “just didn’t fit” anymore was really great.

I had a friend who wasn’t in the lifestyle that also had breast augmentation at the same time that I did. We both talked for hours about our decision to do it, helped each other through recovery and all of that. But the way that we handled our mental part of the procedure was very different. And because of it, she and I are no longer friends. I got my surgery for me. I had wanted it for years, studied on it, did the research for size and all of that. She got hers because her husband wanted her to. We talked about it many times, and I could tell that she was unsure about it, but willing to do it for him. HUGE mistake. When she was in pain, she blamed him, when they didn’t look the way she thought that they should at first, she blamed him. And when it was all said and done, she left him. But as she recovered from the surgery, she began to see her new assets as a tool or weapon to get what she wanted. And she began to think that she was much more than she was. She hadn’t stayed grounded with her new found popularity. 

Looking back on it as I have thought about how much I missed having this person as a friend, I decided that being in the lifestyle may have better prepared me for dealing with the attention that I got. I remembered that I was the same person inside, and had met enough people (men and women) in the lifestyle that had some work done, that I didn’t take the attention all that seriously. I was a single bi female and already got my share of attention. I knew that the new boobs were just window dressing. And nothing more. My friend forgot about the personality flaws that she had all her life, and this new found popularity only accented some of her more selfish traits.

I can see how this would also happen in the lifestyle. We are in such a small area when dealing with others in the lifestyle, that we might forget that improving our physical attributes won’t take care of a shitty disposition, or a careless nature. The people who “find” a new person within themselves may become attention whores, or show offs. They look for any and all opportunities to grab that spotlight and run with it. The trouble comes when they fail to remember that most of us have seen them in the “before” picture…and we didn’t like them then either. And all the grandstanding, and power plays, and sexy behavior doesn’t do anything to improve that conception that people have.  Is it jealousy? Maybe in some peoples minds. But I would mostly say that an avoidable situation just became more unavoidable when everywhere you go, or everything you see on the websites, or at the clubs is centered around people or select groups that just get on your nerves already, and now  becomes almost unbearable. So you stop posting on the websites, and stop going to the places where these limelighters (for lack of another term) go. It’s really a shame. But another fact of life that we must learn. Like I’ve said before……you can’t polish a turd.

To my friend, I’d say…I feel your pain. But to try and remember that there are many many people out here that had cosmetic surgery for our own reasons that had nothing to do with gaining popularity or fame. It’s just like everything else…we must grin and bear it, and move on.  Popularity is fleeting, just like our looks. You can only hold back Mother Nature…and her girlfriend Gravity for so long. Then it’s time to learn to grow old gracefully. And hopefully you  will have friends and family left long after the spot light and cameras are turned off.

peace

Cinnamon

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Goofy Me

I am: an Air Force vet, Mom, sister, friend, Lifestyler, and all-around smartass with a heart of gold. I have lived all over the far East and learned many things about people and cooking, art and true value. I like to share my experience with the rest of the world. I will be the most loyal friend or most annoying enemy you've ever known. Honest to a fault. My life has not always been easy, but it has never ever been boring.

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