~~~Cliche’ Thursday~~~
Posted on: October 21, 2010
I am supposed to be doing a writing assignment for the Red Headed Riter on Thursday. But her Father just passed away, and I’m sad for her in that regard, and the writing assignment had to do with my ideal bedroom and how it would look; and that just doesn’t interest me today. So, I thought I’d take a “saying” or popular cliché’ and talk about it. Today’s is:
“Never make someone a priority in your life, when you are nothing but an option in theirs.”
We’ve all seen this one and it’s rung true for us all from time to time. I tried to do a little research on the origin of the phrase and found out that most think it was written by a woman about a man, when really it was the other way around. Or so my research told me. Man or woman, it’s still a very powerful thought. How many times in our lives have we devoted time, energy, money, emotions and maybe our own personal well-being into trying to make someone love us? Or care about us? Or even just notice us? How many dumb things have you done in school to make the pretty girl, or popular boy want to ask you out? When dressing in the morning; did you do something special just because you knew that person’s favorite color, or style? If if “baby shit yellow” made you look like a walking corpse, if you knew that so in so liked it….you wore it proudly.
How many nights did you sit by the phone waiting for it to ring? At least today, you can at least leave the house and take your cell phone with you. Today’s generation has no idea how much of our lives were given up sitting by the old land line. I can remember a terrible crush I had on a guy in high school. He didn’t know I was alive. But I would go home from school, and clean up and try to look nice. Then I would walk about 2 miles and sit behind some bushes on the side of a street that I knew he had to pass on his way home in the afternoon. When I would hear his motorcycle coming down the street I would just “accidentally” be walking on the side of that street so I could wave to him. He was the best friend of a guy that I knew so sometimes he would actually stop and talk for a couple of minutes. That would make my week. Finally, after this going on for a while he asked me why I was in that part of the neighborhood; especially since he knew where I lived. I blurted the truth out. I said that I was always there, just hoping to get a glimpse of him as he rode by. He looked at me funny and then left. I suppose he found another way home, cause I didn’t see him anymore after that.
Later in life after a big breakup with a guy that I was with for 4 years, I fell head over heels for a guy. This has only been a couple of years or so ago. I was crazy about him. He wasn’t working. Was living at home taking care of his Mom. I’d come up with all kinds of things for us to do just so I could be with him. For him, it was just a bootycall thing. But not to me. I did everything I could think of in hopes that he’d feel the same way about me that I did him. I can still remember the day that he told me that he’d met someone who he wanted to see if it would work out for them. I played the good friend. I was supportive and wished him the best. The whole time he was talking, all I could hear was the pounding of blood in my ears as my heart broke. Right then and there I swore that I would never be at the mercy of someone again. And guess what? I’ve still managed to do it. In different ways for different reasons. Friends have left me hanging, not bothering to keep up with the responsibilities that come with any kind of relationship. Employers have done it. Taking kindness for weakness and putting me on the backburner. But, as in all things….a lesson was learned. I’m getting pretty good with heart bond-o. I just patch the hurt up and go for it again. I never want to become callous and un-feeling. I try very hard not to be the one that “forgets” the other person and their feelings. I’m not perfect, but I do try. A very wise friend that writes her own blog says it best:
Victim is NOT a good Look !!! Right on Grace.
peace,
Cinnamon
4 Responses to "~~~Cliche’ Thursday~~~"
October 22, 2010 at 10:00 am
Grace is standing and applauding this post. Not because you quoted me (even though I appreciate it), but because I am right now, right this very minute, talking myself through an attachment to a person that has caused me a good deal of grief. So thank you, thank you, thank you, my dear!
Cinfulcinnamon's Blog 
October 22, 2010 at 8:45 am
I suppose the saying has a broader meaning as well, in that living is the priority and everything else is optional. I can remember the time when love had to be pursued, doing all you could to pass it on to the one you felt was deserving of it… and to them, you didn’t exist. It made us stronger, I think, to have had to sit by that phone, to write the notes that went unanswered and served to set our priorities straight at some point; today’s electronic world might make finding love easier in some sense but does little or nothing to make one focus on the real priority in life: Living.
October 22, 2010 at 6:04 pm
You are one of my wisest friends !!!